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jactradesThe husband and I are in need of a larger vehicle so we've been spending our free evenings sipping lukewarm coffee and listening to passive-aggressive sales pitches at new & used car dealerships in the area. It's Good Times™, and last night's episode was the best:
Salesdude: "Look, I'm selling you this as low as I possibly can. You can look at The Form - I'm literally only making eight dollars (woe be unto me) from this transaction. And I'm taking a risk on getting my money back from the trade-in on your current car."
Us: *blank faces*
Salesdude, continuing: "So, of course, we don't actually have the vehicle you want. It'll have to be shipped from dealership-in-SmallTown-two-hours-away. That'll add an extra $500 to the final cost."
Me: "You know, my aunt lives in Village-right-next-to-SmallTown. And she has happens to currently have a litter of kittens that I'd like to moon over . I don't see any reason why we couldn't drive up there ourselves this weekend and (after fawning over said kittens) purchase the car from dealership-in-SmallTown. Where the county tax is less, in fact. Unless you're willing to negotiate on that $500 fee."
Salesdude, shocked at the very idea: "But you'd never get the same sort of deal I'm offering on your trade-in at SmallTown! Nevereverever!"
Husband: "I like the kitten idea. How 'bout we take the new car purchase off the table, and just talk about the trade-in? And we'll go up to Village & SmallTown this weekend for the new car purchase. Plus: kittens!"
Salesdude, sadface: "Well, if you aren't buying a new car, my offer for your trade-in is $1,500 less than it was three minutes ago."
Me: "I thought you were only making eight dollars (woe be unto you) on the new car sale. So why does removing it affect the trade-in transaction so much?"
Salesdude: "Well, you see, the evil people in corporate punish us poor dealerships if we don't move enough new cars. So I'd like (a very little tiny bit) to sell a new car to you today. But I can't put a dollar price on how much I value selling a new car. It's not quantifiable or anything. That'd be like asking me to put a dollar price on how VERY much I like you guys!"
Us: *blank faces*
Salesdude: *SMILE*
Me: "You just...did. The new car sale is worth at least $1,500 to you.
Salesdude: *blank face*
Me, with my economist hat on: "It's called revealed preference, bitch!"
Salesdude: *pouts*
...
Shortly thereafter, we walked out.
Salesdude: "Look, I'm selling you this as low as I possibly can. You can look at The Form - I'm literally only making eight dollars (woe be unto me) from this transaction. And I'm taking a risk on getting my money back from the trade-in on your current car."
Us: *blank faces*
Salesdude, continuing: "So, of course, we don't actually have the vehicle you want. It'll have to be shipped from dealership-in-SmallTown-two-hours-away. That'll add an extra $500 to the final cost."
Me: "You know, my aunt lives in Village-right-next-to-SmallTown. And she has happens to currently have a litter of kittens that I'd like to moon over . I don't see any reason why we couldn't drive up there ourselves this weekend and (after fawning over said kittens) purchase the car from dealership-in-SmallTown. Where the county tax is less, in fact. Unless you're willing to negotiate on that $500 fee."
Salesdude, shocked at the very idea: "But you'd never get the same sort of deal I'm offering on your trade-in at SmallTown! Nevereverever!"
Husband: "I like the kitten idea. How 'bout we take the new car purchase off the table, and just talk about the trade-in? And we'll go up to Village & SmallTown this weekend for the new car purchase. Plus: kittens!"
Salesdude, sadface: "Well, if you aren't buying a new car, my offer for your trade-in is $1,500 less than it was three minutes ago."
Me: "I thought you were only making eight dollars (woe be unto you) on the new car sale. So why does removing it affect the trade-in transaction so much?"
Salesdude: "Well, you see, the evil people in corporate punish us poor dealerships if we don't move enough new cars. So I'd like (a very little tiny bit) to sell a new car to you today. But I can't put a dollar price on how much I value selling a new car. It's not quantifiable or anything. That'd be like asking me to put a dollar price on how VERY much I like you guys!"
Us: *blank faces*
Salesdude: *SMILE*
Me: "You just...did. The new car sale is worth at least $1,500 to you.
Salesdude: *blank face*
Me, with my economist hat on: "It's called revealed preference, bitch!"
Salesdude: *pouts*
...
Shortly thereafter, we walked out.
